I’ve taken it upon myself to promote Slutlockerz. Whether it’s because their music’s cool as hell or because the vinyls are taking up space in our walk-in cupboard, doesn’t really matter. Either way the beats are cool and lyrics are wicked.
If you’re talking a seamstress/ I better pop up in your thoughts as the neatest/ My seams are the neatest/ ironed and flat not leaving the creases
Fly like an eagle/ lines are so regal/ with a gold thread through the eye of a needle/ bought the machine time to buy the material/ make a new top and the skirt is the sequal
Making my jewellery/ bending, shaping, taking a few beads/ putting it together in a way that is unique/ everybody asking can you make me a new piece?
Maybe I should sew in a bit/ I flow on the beat like I flow with the stitch/ anybody think they can copy my stitch better stop with the nonsense you’re tacky and kitsch
Give me a pin/I stick to the pattern when I’m sticking them in/I used to get pricked cos I didn’t use a thimble/ never happens now cos my skin isn’t thin
Bring me a tin/ full of my findings/ bits and bobs that I use for designing/ Secret box where my jewels are residing/ when I’m on top autographs I’ll be signing
Lining a dress for morning/ hem on the skirt was so messy before me/ now it looks so perfect you could sell it for forty/ put it up on ebay and the bids will get naught
Needles are sharp/ I’ve got a whole box that I take to the park/sit in the sun getting straight with a cross stitch/ carry on late in my flat after dark
Practice my art/ making it purfect/ spending time and money cos the effort is worth it/ I’ve said it once before so I know that you’ve heard it/ give it to the people who I reckon deserve it
My girls looking hot/ Emma, Lizzi and Hannah have got/ something cool and original I gave them that you can’t find in the net or shops
I bet that you want/ send me a cheque and I’ll send you a box/ better yet I can look at your stitch and talk you through all the problems and faults
And the result?/ you’ll be just like me/ cutting cloth with precision and stylee/ make hot clothes like I’m cutting for Kylie/ everybody knows that my fingers are sprightly
He has the basic set up – Cool Edit Pro, mics, mixers, sound effect machine thingamabob etc. etc. and one day last summer he decided it’d be cool for us to make a couple of songs together. First up Jeff started making some beats, then invited me to have a listen and think about some lyrics. The sound was great, but where was I going to find some lyrics from?
A few months earlier we’d been laughing about Ludacris and his lyrics – examples such as you gotta run in your panyhoes and it’s just a hoasis got us thinking about how Ludacris would react to things around and about London and in general everyday life. And that’s when the line I’ll have a live in groom in my living room was born.
This line just seemed to fit with the beats Jeff was making and before I knew it I was scribbling away and prepared to give him my first lines. Jeff loved it and thought I was a natural rapper. So, we set his kit up and I rapped away. I think it only took us a few takes, then for some over-dubbing and it was done – Living Room was born. All it required was a video, which Jeff whisked up with Windows Movie Maker, and time to upload to You Tube. It’s had just 73 views to date and only one rating (I think that was me). But check it out: